The Most Compelling Form of Communication

Part of becoming an effective, confident communicator is being compelling, being magnetic where people are drawn to listen to you.

And there is one special form of communication that makes any speaker much more magnetic.

Storytelling!

Ever since we could comprehend language, our parents, teachers, family, and friends told us stories. Some were fantastical, some were real, but nevertheless, there was always a good story to hear.

Even when we become working adults, we still gravitate towards the storytellers. After work or during a happy hour, when we grab a drink with our coworkers, we are interested in and ask for stories of how their day went, what they did during the weekend, or their holiday shenanigans.

And we are also all familiar with stories that are so boring that we are just itching to either change the subject or abandon ship.

So why are stories all so powerful? And why do some stories capture our attention, while others could not end fast enough?

Below are 6 concepts around why great stories are so effective (and why mediocre stories are not!).

1. It has a beginning, middle, and end

Good stories have a beginning, middle, and end. Yes, it is as simple as that. And yet, people get this wrong!

Have you heard a story that started off alright, something like, “I parked in my usual spot this morning, locked the car, and headed towards the office….” 

But then it went into the middle… and never ended? That could sound something like, “I got my usual morning coffee at the coffee cart. Then I sat at my desk, checked my day’s to-do list. I attended our morning stand-up meeting, where I shared what I was going to do that day. Then I stopped by my buddy, Bill’s cubicle to check-in and see how he was doing.” and on and on and on. BORING!

Great stories have a beginning that is enticing, a middle that gives the audience relevant information, and an ending that wraps it up.

For example: “I rushed to the office this morning, coffee in hand, reviewed my to-do’s for the day to discover the mountain of tasks I had to complete before my end of day deadline (BEGINNING). During our morning stand-up meeting, I noted all the tasks I had to complete today and expressed the need for some help. So Bill took a couple of things off my plate. After the stand-up, I went to check in with Bill across the hall to see if he had any questions on what to do (MIDDLE). We ended up getting everything done on time, all thanks to my buddy, Bill (END).” 

2. You can imagine the scene

When listening to a great story, have you ever felt like time has stopped and you have been transported into another world? 

A great story is one that you can literally see the events play out in your mind’s eye. This is why reading books is so enticing. Books usually do a great job of describing a scene, characters, and action. And the best part of these books’ descriptions is that it is up to the reader to decide how to imagine each scene.

Even in our short story with Bill, you can imagine the morning rush, the coffee in hand, and the mountain of tasks. You can also probably see the setting in a familiar office space. 

Being able to imagine a story is a part of what keeps us immersed in the experience and sitting at the edge of our seats. 

3. You see through the experience of the main character

Piggybacking on the previous concept, one of the main reasons we love a story is because we can see the experience as the main character. I mean when your coworker is telling the story, it is like you put on an imaginary VR headset and can see the action playing out as if you were the star of the show.

When you feel immersed in a story, you “see” it from the eyes of the main character. So at every twist and turn, you can see, hear, feel, even taste and smell what is around you, and it has you begging to know what is next because you cannot leave the “cinematic experience” before you know the story’s ending.

4. It evokes emotions

Going back to how Bill saved the day. Did you feel the urgency, overwhelm, or panic at the beginning, followed by relief and gratitude towards the end? 

Emotion is more than just being able to imagine a story, but also resonating with how the main character is feeling. As human beings, we do not like sitting in negative feelings, which is why we have a fight or flight response or feel a need to distract ourselves from the discomfort. Many times, those negative emotions are introduced with a conflict (e.g. mountain of tasks vs tight deadline).

So if you introduce your story with an enticing conflict, your audience will want you to continue the story to resolve the conflict and no longer live with the discomfort. 

5. Relatability

Have you felt like our friend above who leaned on Bill to get the mountain of tasks done? How about rushing into work with your morning coffee? 

Not only does a great story evoke emotion, but they are also relatable to the audience. Stories that are relatable make it easier to understand what the storyteller is going through. 

A relatable story also capitalizes on the concept that people like other people who are similar to themselves, like having a common interest. When the audience identifies with your story, they feel more similar to you and thus will like you just a little bit more. 

Another reason why we like relatability is that it can easily lend itself to the next story. Have you ever heard a really great, but obscure, narrative that had you nodding and saying something like, “Wow that’s so neat….” and then not know what to say next so the conversation not-so-smoothly changed subject? That’s because it was not relatable. When you tell a relatable story, you can give your colleagues the opportunity to ask you questions or to share a related narrative of their own. 

6. There is a compelling takeaway

Last but certainly not least, a great story has some sort of takeaway. 

While this is related to having an ending, it is more than wrapping it up with a nice little bow. 

Having a compelling takeaway should be part of the story that the listener should remember. It is like passing the, “Why did you tell me this?” test. 

For example, the takeaway from Bill’s story could be a number of things, like asking for help makes for great teamwork, having morning stand-ups are important for transparency, or that Bill is a stand-up guy and deserves recognition. The takeaway will depend on your audience and the context, but having a takeaway is a crucial part of making sure your story ends on a memorable note. 

And that’s a wrap: 6 concepts on why stories are so compelling. 

And here is the takeaway: if practiced well, storytelling can be your greatest asset, not just during a work happy hour, but also during interviews, networking, and presentations. If you follow these storytelling concepts whenever you want to grab your audience’s attention, I promise you will be a better, more compelling speaker.

So what’s your story? Comment below with your compelling story!

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